CANINE FILMS

TOP DOG WAS AN INSTANT CLASSIC AND THE BIGGEST HIT OF 1986 GROSSING OVER 180,000,000 BISCUITS

THE GREATEST AMERICAN DOG - EPISODE SIX

Hey everypups. Well, last night's show was OK. Nothing really spectacular. I really enjoyed the Dog Bone Challenge, though. Any challenge with food has got my vote. A barrier was set up to separate the dog from the food and the dog was timed on how fast he or she took to figure out how to reach the food. Bill and Star won the challenge with a smoking 8.3 seconds, now that's a dog that likes her chicken. But in return for Teresa and Leroy giving up first place to Bill and Star last week, Bill did the same and gave them the Dog Bone Suite. The next challenge was absolutely ridiculous and I can't wait to hear what Toby has to say about it. The challenge was art. The dogs had to paint a picture. Now it did look like fun rolling around in the paint, but come on, Rembrandt we ain't. Teresa and Leroy were top dogs and Laura and Preston were shown the Doggie Door. And if I didn't already dislike JD, I really do now. He is such a doggie's behind. Did you pups hear him when he said that he believes all of the other dog owners wished their dogs were just like his dog? What a pompous ass!!! JD really needs to go.

SCUBA'S FIRST PICK - RON AND TILLMAN ARE GONE
SCUBA'S SECOND PICK - BILL AND STAR


Well, I will agree with you about JD. Holy puppy poop!!! Just who does this jerk think he is? God's gift to dogs? I don't think so. Did you see him after he was picked as one of the bottom three at the art challenge? Poor Galaxy, just wanted to lick JD's face and offer a little support but JD scolded her. That's just not right. I was really hoping that he would be sent packing but after listening to Laura rat out Beth Joy and Bella Starlett, I was glad she was shown the Doggie Door. Just because her painting was the worst and she knew it, she decided to try and take out Beth Joy and portray her as an abusive owner. Bella Starlett did cry a bit when she had to wear the sponges on her paws but you should hear Norman whine when Mom trims his nails. Some dogs just don't like to have their little paws touched. Anyway, my pick of Bill and Star are still in it and as always Bill was a perfect gentlemen and Star, zipping through the Dog Bone Challenge the way she did was just pawsome.

KEIKO'S PICK - BILL AND STAR

GRRRR!!! First of all, Keiko, I don't whine. Second, I don't have little paws. Anyway, I agree with you about JD. Something's wrong with that boy. He seems to think that he's some bigtime dog trainer and walks around with his snout in the air. Nothing against Galaxy, I think that she's a pawsome dog, but JD really sucks. And I really don't know what the deal was with Laura ratting out Beth Joy. I know it's a competition but you gotta play fair and that was as bad as Laurie snitching out David and Elvis. But Travis shocked everyone and stood up for Beth Joy. I don't reckon he's gonna get Laura's phone number now, huh? And speaking of Travis, he and my boy Presley are still in it and are doing pretty good.

NORMAN'S PICK - TRAVIS AND PRESLEY

I guess we're all in agreement that JD is a doggie's behind. Someone should put him in his place. He came into this thing totally convince he was the next best thing to bacon. Well, he might be able to teach Galaxy lots of tricks but that is because she's a smart dog, not because he such a great trainer. JD is probably as bad as that Dog Whisperer Jerk, Cesar what's his butt. Anyway, the Dog Bone Challenge was great. I agree with Scuba, any challenge with food is always good. Travis and Presley did really well but Bill and Star were just too much to handle. You've got to hand it to Star, for such a mild-mannered pup, she's been tearing up the place. But I'll have to still go with my second pick of Travis and Presley. There's just a really pawsome bond between those two.

DUKE'S FIRST PICK - RON AND TILLMAN ARE GONE
DUKE'S SECOND PICK - TRAVIS AND PRESLEY


What the hell is going on in the world today? I mean really, dogs painting? You're kidding right? That's not art. You want to see art? Just come over to the house and I can show you a backyard full of carefully dug holes spread out in a wonderful southwestern design which focuses on the natural beauty of the desert. Now that's art. Anyway, I'm still thinking that the show is rigged and the judges are still doggie's behinds. They'll probably give the trophy to JD the jerk. And you're right Duke, JD does remind me of the Dog Whisperer Jerk, Cesar what's his butt. As soon as OPERATION PEE ON HUGO is over, we'll have to put together OPERATION PEE ON JD THE JERK and give him the three legged salute.

SPACE CADET KEIKO

AFTER MANY YEARS OF TRAINING, SPACE CADET KEIKO FULFILLS HER LIFELONG DREAM OF CHASING TENNIS BALLS IN SPACE

NORMAN DREAMS

Norman von Richthofen,also known as The Red Dog Baron.
His daring and skill legendary, The Red Dog Baron was the top ace for the Canine Forces in World War Two, officially being credited for 80 victories over the much feared Fascist Felines