THE GREATEST AMERICAN DOG - EPISODE FIVE

Woof, everypups. Well, I've recovered from Ron and Tillman being so mercilessly tossed through the doggie door. Last night's show was a good one. I liked the Dog Bone Challenge which featured a mud pit beneath a balance beam the dogs had to cross, with the winner receiving letters and photos from home. Teresa and Leroy won but then gave first place to Bill and Star. It was very emotional for Bill reading his wife's letter and seeing the photos of his family. Star was a little more composed, she was just happy to be there. The last challenge was a dance competition where the teams had to coordinate a dance routine to different types of music. Laurie and Andrew were chosen as Best in Show with Brandy and Beacon being shown the doggie door.

SCUBA'S FIRST PICK - RON AND TILLMAN ARE GONE
SCUBA'S SECOND PICK - BILL AND STAR

Yeah, I really enjoyed the show and I was glad that Teresa gave first place to Bill and Star. Bill seems like such a nice man and he treats Star really well. As far as the dance competition, I thought it was kind of cheesy and it was obvious that JD thought he and Galaxy should have won. He just gave Laurie a dirty look when she and Andrew were named Best in Show. But at least Brandy was booted off. I really feel sorry for Beacon having to put up with that screeching all of the time.

KEIKO'S PICK - BILL AND STAR

Perhaps we should organize a rescue mission and save poor Beacon. Anyway, I like the show but JD is really starting to really tick me off. When Galaxy fell off the beam into the mud JD didn't even look at him or pet him or anything. JD was so mad at his dog. That's just not right. Galaxy did the best he could, maybe we should rescue him as well. And the dance competition, well, someone should tell the shows creators that we're dogs, not Fred Astaire. I felt so sorry for Presley in his routine with Travis. Presley just gave Travis a 'I'm not gonna make a fool of myself for you or anybody' look and didn't really participate in the routine. But they're still my picks, I just hope the competition gets back to doing real dog stuff instead of this foo-foo poop they've been doing.

NORMAN'S PICK - TRAVIS AND PRESLEY

I agree with you, Norman. JD is turning into a dog's behind. He seems to think that he and Galaxy should be given first place in every event and that he is such a great dog trainer. Well, a great dog trainer wouldn't get mad at his dog when his dog gave a great effort. I really hope JD gets the boot next week. Anyway, the dance competition was just ridiculous, Norman's right, just let them be dogs. But at least Brandy was shown the doggie door. Poor Beacon, we really need to go save him. He doesn't listen to Brandy because he's deaf from all of that screaming that Brandy does. Let's see, does Toby have anything to add?

DUKE'S FIRST PICK - RON AND TILLMAN
DUKE'S SECOND PICK - TRAVIS AND PRESLEY

Yeah, the dance competition was really stupid and the judges are doggie behinds. For those pups out there who are interested, I'll be organizing a rescue mission to save Beacon from the evil witch Brandy and while we're at it, we might as well rescue Kenji, Ezzie and Galaxy too. And since I'm still boycotting the show, I'm not picking a winner cause the whole show is rigged.

GREATEST AMERICAN DOG - EPISODE FOUR

Freakin unbelievable. They booted off Ron and Tillman. Has the world gone mad? What’s wrong with those judges? Last night’s show started out pretty good with the humans having to predict whether their dog would pick up or leave certain items during the Dog Bone challenge. JD and Galaxy won the challenge and sent Travis and Presley to the doghouse. After that the show went straight to Hades. I guess I’m gonna have to pull for Bill and Star now.
SCUBA’S SECOND PICK – BILL AND STAR

You’ll have to forgive Scuba, she’s a little emotional about her pick of Ron and Tillman being shown the doggie door and I have to agree with her. The final challenge was a photo shoot based on the dog’s personality with one catch. The personalities were pre-selected and the humans had to draw out of a bowl for their dog’s personality, which makes no sense whatsoever. Ron and Tillman picked the lazy personality and that’s what they did but the judges hated the photo. Said it was the worst photo of a bulldog they had ever seen. But at least Bill and Star are still in it.
KEIKO’S PICK – BILL AND STAR

And what about Teresa, she picked the personality of anger and used the snarl band around Leroy’s snout to get him to snarl? Did you pups see that? Or what about her tormenting him to make him angry? Then she gets mad when he bites her. On top of that, the judges reamed her for using the snarl band saying it was inhumane and cruel (which it is) but then turn around and boot off Ron and Tillman. Not making a lot of sense. But I do agree that JD and Galaxy’s photo of a sneaky personality was pretty cool. And my boys Travis and Presley are still in it, sorry Scuba.
NORMAN’S PICK – TRAVIS AND PRESLEY

Just filling in while Toby throws his tantrum, though I think Scuba may be right behind him. I’m in agreement with you pups that the judges just ain’t right in the head. And I’m really sorry to see Ron and Tillman leave; I was pulling for that big-headed dog. I guess now I go for Travis and Presley. Wait a minute, I think Toby wants to say something.

DUKE’S PICK – TRAVIS AND PRESLEY

GRRRR!!!!

THE GREATEST AMERICAN DOG

The Greatest American Dog aired last night and I have to say that I really enjoyed the show. And for those who missed it, Michael and Ezzie were the first pair to be shown the doggie-door. Personally, I didn't much care for Michael. He seemed more interested in showcasing his lack of talent than showing off what Ezzie could do. Also, I think I'm gonna pull for Ron and Tillman, they seem to work well together. What do you think, Keiko?
SCUBA'S PICK - RON AND TILLMAN


I agree with you, Scuba. Michael is a freakoid egotistical maniac and I felt sorry for Ezzie. She seemed to be intimidated by him. Too bad the judges just don't kick off the humans and keep the dogs. That what they should do. Anyway, I'm gonna be rooting for Bill and Star. He seems like a really nice human who loves his dog and Star is a very smart dog. Did you hear that she can tell when Bill's wife is having problems with her diabetes? I think that's really great. What do you think, Norman?
KEIKO'S PICK - BILL AND STAR


Yeah, Michael had to go and if I've got to pick someone to go next week it's that freak Brandy. Did you see her dressing up poor Beacon? Geeeez, let the dog be a dog, for dog's sake. And I didn't like the way she kept pushing Beacon down to make her sit during the final competition. I was glad when the judge scolded her for doing that. As for me, I like Travis and Presley, they make a good team. What do you think, Toby?
NORMAN'S PICK - TRAVIS AND PRESLEY


Personally, I wouldn't have cared if both Michael and Brandy were shown the doggie-door last night. Just by looking at those two humans, I can tell that they're not really dog people, they're just in it for themselves. And I really liked the way the judges mentioned non-physical reinforcement for training. I think that's so pawsome. I was gonna pick JD and Galaxy but after reading that JD doesn't like to spoil dogs, I've change my mind and I'm gonna pull for David and Elvis. Any human who spends $10,000 on a party for his dog has got my vote.
TOBY'S PICK - DAVID AND ELVIS